How Meaning Reclaims Agency

One image from my psychology textbook remains particularly vivid. It depicts a shuttle box-a chamber bisected by a low barrier-to illustrate the origins of learned helplessness. In the experiment, researchers first harness the dog and subject it to inescapable shocks. Later, the dog is moved to the shuttle box, where a switch electrifies the floor. Although a simple leap offers safety, the dog remains still; it has internalized its own futility. Rather than seeking an exit, the animal becomes hollowly passive. The barking stops, the whimpers fade, and the dog collapses onto the grid, absorbing the current with paralyzed resignation. When you see this same decoupling of effort from outcomes in humans, we call it depression. Consider how this plays out for Alex, a 35-year-old man. Following a difficult divorce, Alex’s recent failures dictate how he perceives his limits. He initially pursues his habitual interests-socializing, reading, and sport-yet these activities fail to soothe his pervasive numbness. Alex concludes that he cannot regulate his mood. Inevitably, he withdraws from his social circles and abandons his hobbies. This retreat further isolates him and intensifies his depression. He reinforces his belief that his environment cannot change, eventually succumbing to total lethargy. While Alex collapses under the weight of the unchangeable, you might find yourself struggling with the opposite extreme. Sarah, for instance, attempts to exert agency over the immutable. Like Sarah, you may find it impossible to ascertain your social impact after socializing at a party; to bridge this gap of uncertainty, she ruminates on her speech and mannerisms. Although Sarah cannot retroactively alter her performance, she worries as a proxy for control. This strategy backfires; her anxiety merely multiplies “what-if” scenarios, further misaligning her perceived control with reality.

But can we stay sane? The bible’s Serenity Prayer provides one answer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.

Modern clinical practice mirrors this perspective, guiding individuals like Alex and Sarah toward serenity. Most of us enter therapy feeling either powerless or exhausted by attempts to control the immutable-others’ opinions, physiological anxiety, or the past. Thus, skilled therapists, together with their client, identify the exact space where your choice becomes possible.

Specifically, this approach defines the core of logotherapy. The Greeks translate this as “healing through meaning”. Viktor Frankl developed this existential framework following his survival of Auschwitz, a period he documented in Man’s Search for Meaning. Frankl observed that when guards deprived prisoners of their agency, the prisoners often surrendered their will to live. When actions no longer influence survival, existential resignation becomes a psychological defense.

Frankl, however, shifted his mental horizon to the immediate present. He focused on manageable objectives-such as surviving the next roll call-rather than distant, uncertain liberation. He recognized that while guards controlled his physical existence, they could not colonize his internal life. By framing the camp’s atrocities as secondary to his post-war mission of lecturing on the psychology of suffering, he maintained a purpose that transcended his environment. Frankl ultimately attributed his survival to this philosophy of meaning, coupled with a significant degree of luck.

Frankl’s wisdom can enrich your existence. To apply this framework, first document your current challenges and identify the variables determining their outcomes. Categorize these factors into two domains: the controllable-such as effort, preparation, and attitude-and the immutable-such as external opinions, the past, or market fluctuations. This classification directs energy productively and reshapes how we set goals. For example, rather than aiming to “win a procurement” (a low-control outcome), one might commit to “articulating arguments pertinently and listening actively” (high-control actions).

Even in seemingly powerless situations, Frankl advocates for stable self-expectations that do not change when your circumstances do. If your meaning is tied solely to your career, a layoff proves catastrophic; however, anchoring your identity in values-like dignity, integrity, or service-ensures that agency remains intact regardless of circumstance. Human flourishing requires acknowledging the boundaries of our influence-not as a defeat, but as the clarity that precedes effective action. By relinquishing the exhausting attempt to command the unchangeable, we finally free our hands to utilize the tools that work.